The only thing that the IRS has not taxed yet is the male penis.
This is due to the fact that 69% of the time it is hanging around unemployed, 10% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed off and 1% of the time it is in the hole. On top of that, it has two dependents and they are both nuts!
HOWEVER, effective January 1st, 2009, the penis will now be taxed according to size:
The brackets are as follows (I don’t understand those inches stuff, calculate yourself!):
– 10 to 12″  – Luxury Tax of $ 300
– 8 to 10″ – Pole Tax – $ 250
– 5 to 8″ – Privilege Tax – $ 150
– 3 to 5″ – Nuisance Tax – $ 30
Notes:
– Males exceeding 12″ must file capital gains.
– Anyone under 3″ is eligible for a tax refund.
– PLEASE DO NOT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION
The IRS did not explain which party voted for the new tax.
I am fortunate not to be IRS-liable.