Never remember those NPC and other acronyms, not that I miss anything. Actually I would love to miss them.
Matthew Crabbe calls it “The Annual Gathering of the Fossils” (I prefer dinosaurs or funeral meetings).
This year delegates were asked not to sleep or disappear from the meetings to have long tea breaks. Sit, don’t talk, either stare in front of you as a statue or pretend you are busy taking notes. And of course, all vote yes. Don’t talk with journalists, and say all is swell. Those are the instructions. Obviously journalists were not too pleased.
As always so-called minorities in colorful dresses were there for the journalists to make some nice shots, and to pretend those people are for real and do have something to say.
The meetings are a total waste of time for everybody except to show the great motherland all is swell and united. Those who disagree promptly disappear in officially non-existent “hotels” and provide extra income for those who report them to ze-men-in-black.
It’s a waste of time as it stops life in the city, messes up traffic; the entertainment industry has to “behave” – no monkey business as for now till the fossils go back home (bad for the economy!). Viagra is not recommended in this period.
The fossils are officially not allowed to enjoy the good life and are not supposed to park their black Audis in front of sauna and massage clubs. No problem, they promptly cover their number plates with newspapers to alert passers-by they are there. Silly.
All that does not mean Chinese don’t discuss and possibly disagree – it is all done behind closed doors and weeks in advance. All in the family. Transparency is not in the vocabulary yet but more and more Chinese start complaining about it.
Meanwhile the police and other security people have to work more. Explains why I just saw a policeman drive his car without hands as he was busy smoking and talking on the phone. Overworked, the poor guys. And all those army cars (read: nice luxury cars with a WJ plate) driving around, visibly filled with civilian-looking guys enjoying the good life with their girlfriends.
Then those people wonder why we don’t like them.
Letting Steam Off
One more reason to fly first class
Mourning for the lost husband
Anna had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her and urging her to get back into the world.
Finally, Anna said she’d go out, but didn’t know anyone.
Her daughter immediately replied, “Mom! I have someone for you to meet.”
Well, it was an immediate hit. They took to one another and after dating for six weeks, he asked her to join him for a weekend in Vermont.
Their first night there, she undressed as he did.
There she stood nude, except for a pair of black lacy panties; he was in his birthday suit.
Looking her over, he asked, “Why the black panties?”
She replied: “My breasts you can fondle, my body is yours to explore, but down there I am still mourning.”
He knew he was not getting lucky that night.
The following night was the same – she stood there wearing the black panties, and he was in his birthday suit – but now he was wearing a black condom.
She looked at him and asked: “What’s with the black condom?”
He replied, “I want to offer my deepest condolences.”
Monument under attack
Here’s a legal question:
Is this statutory rape……or just a monumental mistake?
(Now I understand my U.S. friends who say those animals are real stupid and so easily get hit by cars…)
Sexy Beckham promoting sexual stimulant?
Sexy Beckham promoting sexual stimulant?
As reported by the media, like here in BizChinaUpdate:
A Beijing-based aphrodisiac manufacturer has produced an advert with Beckham and his wife Victoria seen gleefully endorsing, via Chinese-language dubbing, the effect the product has had on their sex life. Beckham gushes about the formula’s key role in “satisfying Victoria in bed.”
The faked advert uses footage of the Beckhams – along with “interviews” featuring Sean Connery and Keanu Reeves – to promote the sexual stimulant, called USA Selikon. The ad has gained a wide audience in China, both in the selected cities where it has been broadcast, and on the Internet where downloads of it are freely available.
The three stars clearly had no part in making the advert, and the footage has been obtained illegally and over-dubbed to give the impression that they are talking openly about their penchant for stimulatory Chinese medicines.
Nobody knows yet what Beckham’s reaction will be. But our Chinese friends are showing shameless commercialism (if it would be a joke – still acceptable…). Now just imagine that a similar fake video would circulate in the UK with Yao Ming promoting some British Viagra. You can expect a mass protest of the Chinese cybernationalists, the Chinese government calling the British ambassador to express indignation, the UK being a target of violence here in China.
Chinese can be so damned sensitive but are we always supposed to swallow their crap?
Maybe I detect some Confucius influence here?